Kris Irvin, a transgender man, is getting top surgery no matter what religious leaders have to say.
Irvin, a Mormon, attends Brigham Young University and is studying English. Irvin had their eye on a new major, editing and publishing, but their top surgery may prevent them from continuing to study at BYU. Enrollment at BYU is conditional on endorsements that are renewed each year to confirm that students are indeed living by the standards set by the Mormon Church.
But it’s unclear how the Church assesses top surgery. According to the Advocate, the handbook for lay leaders explains that a “transsexual operation” could result in discipline, but it doesn’t define what kind of surgery that includes and whether the removal of breast tissue specifically is subject to discipline. It’s also unclear whether other steps such as hormone therapy and dressing according to one’s gender as a trans person are considered subject to discipline. When asked whether the Mormon Church is likely to have an issue with someone having surgery on their breasts for other reasons, Irvin said church leaders only appear to care when the motivation is tied to being transgender.
Irvin told ThinkProgress they’re aware of transgender Mormons who have had top surgeries without discipline whatsoever. But Irvin’s local bishop told them he would carry out discipline if they get surgery, which Irvin has said is likely to result in losing the endorsement to attend BYU. Other discipline could include limiting their church participation, such as not allowing them to visit Temple or take the sacrament, according to the Salt Lake Tribune.
Irvin wrote to their local bishop, Jake King, and King responded, “It’s not prerequisite that the church and church leaders accept elective transgender surgery in order to accept, love and serve LGBTQ+ members … I know that no surgery can bring you true peace and comfort in this life.”
Irvin told ThinkProgress that although they haven’t looked closely at many other schools, “At this point it’s like if you don’t want me what’s the point of trying to stick it out? What I know is I’m going to being doing top surgery anyway. That’s not an option for me. It’s kind of like, ‘Well, I might as well move on.'”
“What I know is I’m going to being doing top surgery anyway. That’s not an option for me.”
When asked whether the Mormon Church should have a better defined policy, Irvin said, “I go back and forth. On one hand it would be a lot easier for everyone — for trans people, for leaders — if there were more guidelines on how to handle transgender stuff. But at same time, if instructions handed down from headquarters end up being transphobic or overly really strict or harsh, that’s not good.”
Irvin said they expect more from Russell M. Nelson, the current president of the church, a former surgeon.
“The thing that frustrates me is that our current president is a doctor and he has the mental capacity at least to understand the science behind being trans and all the studies coming out that say this is a real thing … It’s still just silence and it’s very sad,” Irvin said.
Irvin said that in the wake of this struggle with the Church, their immediate family has been “awesome” and half of their family is trying to be supportive and learn more about being transgender, but the other half of the family has said “you just need to stop or you’re not welcome at family events.”
Irvin said there isn’t a lot of awareness of the LGBTQ Mormon community and its allies within the Church, but that it is a close-knit community and people are supportive of each other. Although Irvin said they haven’t noticed protests against leadership, “with the internet we’re all usually connected somehow.”
Irvin added, “The Mormon neighborhood is very small but the queer Mormon neighborhood is like one apartment building and everyone knows each other. We have a lot of allies that I have been watching that will stand up for us, which is really nice because it does get exhausting being the only queer person in a congregation and having to speak up for yourself all the time.”
The Salt Lake Tribune reported in 2015 that trans Mormons in Utah formed a support group and attend LGBTQ pride parades. One trans Mormon man, who is listed as female on membership rolls, reportedly did not have surgery and attended a Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints singles ward. He has the support of his bishop, the Tribune reported, though he is still listed as female on membership rolls.
Irvin said they have been lucky to have support since so many people in the LGBTQ community, particularly LGBTQ Mormons, don’t find it. People in the LGBTQ community are almost three times more likely to experience a mental health condition. The rate of suicide attempts among LGBTQ youth is four times greater than it is for straight young people. Irvin, 31, didn’t discover the right word for what they were experiencing — being transgender — until 28, and said their education didn’t acknowledge transgender people.
“You have a lot of queer Mormon kids who are in the closet and they hear how the community is talked about and there isn’t enough support. So they kill themselves because they feel like there isn’t hope in the future,” Irvin said.
“You have a lot of queer Mormon kids who are in the closet and they hear how the community is talked about and there isn’t enough support.”
There was a signal for hope in 2015 when a high-ranking church leader, Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, responded to a mother who has a transgender son and said she didn’t want to fear retaliation for supporting him.
Oaks responded, that “being acquainted with the unique problems of a transgender situation is something we have not had so much experience with, and we have some unfinished business in teaching on that.”
As limited as that response was, some people in the LGBTQ Mormon community found it to be an encouraging sign that leadership would at least spend more time considering how to treat trans Mormons in the church. Given the fact that a lot of church meetings and rituals require separating people by gender, this is a pressing question for the church, Slate explained in 2015. Oaks also commented on Kim Davis, the county clerk who denied queer couples the ability to get married, and said her actions violate the principle of government officers exercising “their civil authority according to the principles and within the limits of civil government.”
BYU has experienced criticism from the LGBTQ community for how its honor code enables the sexual assault of LGBQ sexual assault survivors, who are worried about being subject to discipline. The honor code does not allow “sexual relations between members of the same sex” as well as “all forms of physical intimacy that give expression to homosexual feelings.”
Irvin is married to a man, Nate Irvin, and told the Advocate that because they use they/them pronouns and are not having procedures beyond top surgery, they are not worried that the church will object to the marriage as a same-sex union.